I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
