Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Randomize
