great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
