U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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