my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
