I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
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We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
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You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize