You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
