Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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