shes about as inviting as chlamydia
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Rumble strips road head = magical
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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