I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
