I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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