Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
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I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
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How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
tell me about the fingering
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