how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
