Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize