i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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