its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
