Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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