My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
