Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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