At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
You left your phone here
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