used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize