I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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