Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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