why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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