Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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