We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
