Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
