He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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