Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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