is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
