Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
