its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Randomize
