I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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