we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
