she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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