The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
