that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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