if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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