Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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