just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We were destined to go to rehab together
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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