Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
