i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize