He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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