Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
