I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize