Your face is a jimmy john
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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