wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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