Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
She even gives head with a lisp.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
It's not a walk of shame if you run
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
