how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Actions speak louder than pants.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
