He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
