I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize